There Are Christmas Miracles Out There
It is my feeling that pairing a Mercury retrograde with December and the holidays is so far beyond the pale as to be considered cruel and unusual punishment. A least give me a working computer and functioning WiFi at three in the morning when I’m frantically swiping at Amazon like a spastic spider monkey.
Dear Universe, seriously. It’s the least you can do.
Twisty, Pissy, and Zitty are the names of the Elves on my shelf this season and it’s been all I could do to stay dressed and hydrated as I waited for the sticky, black, cotton-candy energy to clear itself up starting today, December 23rd.
As I lurked under a bridge, all twitchy and covered in raw cookie dough, trying not to scare small children, I couldn’t help but notice the rare and lucky individuals who seem oblivious to the Mercury Mind Fuck—as I like to call it—and they lifted my spirits.
I saw two little boys laugh their faces off while their dog howled a Pavarotti worthy sanata at a singing stuffed snowman. Their laughter was so contagious that everyone within a twenty-foot radius was at least smiling—and that’s saying a lot for LA!
A Hipster held the door for me at Starbucks and the barista, who was wearing flashing Christmas tree earrings and a Santa hat was so authentically cheerful that it was impossible to hate her. Trust me, I tried.
I locked my keys in the car at the market. Again. (I know, I know, there’s an MRI in my future!) Anyway… SEVERAL people, which, in case you’re wondering is more than two, offered to help me. One couple even offered to drive me all the way home to get my spare key.
I gotta say, in the current climate of “If you’re not with me you’re against me,” and “Every man for himself,” I consider common decency a Christmas miracle. Truly.
Here is another one.
May the spirit of Christmas, whatever that means to you, find a sacred place to land in your life (preferably in your heart or your kishkes and not in the corner of your eye or between your teeth). And may it bring you healing, peace, a loooong table—and pie (although not necessarily in that order) for many a day (or at least until the second of January when we all go back to work so we can pay our American Express bills).
Merry Christmas, I love you all!